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2014 Goals

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It’s that time of the year again – well, it was that time of year again a few weeks ago – but close enough, where I sit down and think of things that I want to accomplish in the next year. I have thought about this topic quite a bit actually, even before the calendar flipped over to the new year. It’s sort of anxiety inducing but at the same time, it’s nice to have a list to look at and cross some things off. Resolutions have never really been my thing, as like most people, I find that they are hard to keep. There has been one major huge gigantic mega goal that I have been able to come up with that will definitely be a challenge to obtain, but will be totally worth it… Ready?


Now to some people this may not seem like much of a stretch – but let me elaborate. It’s about to get all kinds of personal up in here. A few years ago during a traumatic break-up, I decided that I needed to seek out the help of a therapist. I have always battled with depression, but I hit a pretty low low and knew that I could no longer deal with my issues myself because my current coping was not working for me.

I was diagnosed with depression (shocker! hah) and as a co-dependent. Talk about an eye opening experience. When I thought of co-dependency I always thought it meant that I was dependent on others to do things for me and make me happy. In a way this is true, but it is pretty much the exact opposite. I only feel happy when making others happy. Whether it means that I sacrifice my own happiness, money, time, etc. to do it that is how I feel happy, and when those people betray me, my brain cannot wrap around why they would do that because of everything that I feel that I have done for them – which they may have not even felt like what I was doing was out of the way for me.

A light went on. And it was actually kind of refreshing to know that there was a method to my madness. I have been making myself miserable for years under the guise of feeling happy that I was helping others who either a) never asked to be helped b) don’t appreciate the help c) never knew how I felt. Breaking the habit of co-dependency is a horrible feeling. I am by nature a people pleaser, a yes (wo)man, and apparently have no backbone. I have a hard time saying no and this usually gets abused. When I was in therapy I had to make a list of things that week that I either said no to or that I was doing for myself. It was hard in the beginning, but after a while, it started to feel really good.

It was nice to know that my friends wouldn’t hate me, or hell, even think differently of me if I said no to something. Work did not reprimand me for saying no either – the world kept spinning, and nothing catastrophic happened. I started to feel better, and really empowered by my new found ability to say no. Now don’t get me wrong, I am still selfless – I volunteer with a non-profit, I help friends in need, etc. etc. but I would look at things in a different way. Am I doing this because the person is asking for help or am I doing this because I feel compelled to help them to make me feel happy?

Flash forward a year or two – I am falling back into my old ways. I have become complacent about my own happiness again and its really starting to wear on me. So my goal this year is to make me happy. Do things that I want to do. Go places I want to go. Accomplish things I want to accomplish. Not steamrolling others in the process, but not putting too much stock into how I think they will feel – when in reality I have no idea. I am paralyzing myself and my dreams because of how I think others will perceive what I am doing as selfish instead of either a) having faith that the friends that I have will respect my choices and encourage me or b) associating with people who only use me for my inability to say no.

I am on the cusp of turning 30 – and feel like I have accomplished more for others than I have myself, so this is a year of change. Wish me luck.

Oh and I also want to: finish a half marathon, run a half marathon at Disneyland, get rid of my storage unit, thin out my possessions, read 30 books, blog more on here and Spoil your Dinner, pay down my debt even more, save to move out, buy a new car, create something every week, make a new friend (or friends!), get my memorial tattoo on my leg, try one new food a month, and keep in better contact with my friends.

26 January, 2014

2013 Goals – The Recap

Well it’s that time of year again where we all sit down and make up goals of what we are going to accomplish in the near year. Let’s take a little time and look back on what I set out to achieve in 2013.


  • Enroll in school: This has been a goal of mine for quite some time now. With my new job, my evenings are free which allows me to make some evening classes. I really want to make this happen. So about that – School most definitely did not happen this year, but has not dropped of the list of priorities. 
  • Save some money: I have no monetary amount that I am wanting to save, but having a little money in the bank will definitely be a nice little peace of mind. I managed to save a bit of my tax return that I received this year and am using it to take a trip to Disneyland in two weeks with a couple of friends. Also, for the first time that I can remember, I did not put a single Christmas gift on a credit card. While this isn’t exactly saving money, it is not adding to the mountain of debt that I am currently chipping away at. 
  • Move out: I am enjoying the rent free aspect of my life right now, as it has been a great way to get control back of my finances, but I am dying for some space of my own. I did not accomplish this, however, still something that I am looking to do, hopefully in the near future. 
  • Blog more on and I am trying to focus on making more time in my day to blog, as it is something I am truly passionate about. I think for the most part spoilyourdinner received a lot more love than the ole pixie blog did. 
  • Create a gym routine:I have had a gym membership for cover a year, but have fallen off the wagon. I know that a lot of people have resolutions or goals that revolve around health/fitness. I honestly enjoy the gym but I get bored easily with the same ole same ole. I need to find an interesting routine that will keep me engaged. I spent the first portion of the year not really hitting the gym, but I signed up to run a half marathon in the middle of March 2014, so lately I have been doing a lot of running and lifting. It feels really great to be back at the gym, though I prefer to run outside than on a treadmill, but with the weather being so cold and it being so dark by the time I get home, I have no choice. I have hit some pretty major milestones fitness-wise. I have lost weight and I can finally start seeing that I have lost it, I can run for 3o minutes at a time, which has never been a thing for me, and in general I feel and look stronger. 
  • Become full time at work: I don’t have control over the hours I am scheduled at work, but I plan on working as hard as I can, learning as much as I can, and stepping up as much as I can to prove that I am worth working full time. HUZZAH! I accomplished this and then some. I became full time in the middle of February and I am now at the point where I have been working overtime to try and keep up. 
  • Get tattooed: I would love to work on my left arm, but that is a large commitment and I have no interest in going long periods of time between getting tattooed. I have a lot of smaller pieces that I would love to knock out, hopefully I can cross one of these off my list this year. No tattoos for me this year – so sad. 
  • Take more pictures with my camera: There was a time when I never went anywhere without my camera. Ever since I got my iPhone I have hardly picked up my real camera. I want to take tons more pictures this year with both my digital camera and film cameras. Sadly my camera still sits untouched on a shelf. 
  • Play more video games and beat them: There are lots of games that I have started but have not finished. I have also yet to 100% a game on my 360. I want to accomplish that at least once. I have been playing more video games but still haven’t complete one to 100%. This will happen… someday… 
  • Read 30 books: I have never been much of a reader, but it’s definitely something that i want to try and improve. My mom got me a Kindle for Christmas, which make toting books around much easier. I accomplished about half of this goal, which in reality, I’m pretty proud of considering I never thought I was much for reading. What I have found is that I just need to find the right books. 
  • Try one new food a month: I have been a picky eater my entire life. I think trying one new food a month is a very doable goal. Does junk food count? The new breakout stars for food for me have been my new found love of almonds and dried cranberries. (they don’t have to be together either) 
  • Pay down some bills: I have been up to my eyeballs in credit card debt for years now. It has been nothing but an extreme burden and paying off even just 1 card would be amazing. Like I mentioned in my money saving goal, paying down my credit cards has been a huge project for me. With some of them set to be paid off in the middle of 2014, I couldn’t be more excited to lift some of that weight of my financial shoulders. 
  • Make a new friend: I am painfully shy. My list of friends here is very short and I would love to gather up the courage to make a new friend I think I made a new friend? We will see how it goes. 
  • Save up for a new computer or laptop: My computer is 10 years old and my laptop died a year and a half ago. I would be content with a netbook or something of the sort. Something with a keyboard would be nice. Some of the money that I saved from my tax return was used to buy a Chromebook. This has been pretty handy! It doesn’t do all of the things that a normal laptop would do, but it’s lightweight and easy to throw in a bag. I also received a Toshiba laptop and an iMac for Christmas – hello upgrades!
  • Get to 1000 finds geocahing: I am just under half way there, and have hardly geocached in the last year. I used to be an avid cacher, but life always seemed to get in the way. Ugh. I did not find a single geocache this year. How sad!

So there is a brief recap of what I accomplished this year and I’m pretty proud. There were a lot of things that I did that were not on my list and I look forward to 2014 being even better.

30 December, 2013

Happy New Year!

I hope everyone had a great new years! Mine consisted of tacos and French fries and a movie, super crazy night I know. I actually really enjoyed the low key evening while letting the crazies do their thing. I’m not one for resolutions and what not but the last few days I have been thinking about my goals for the new year. What do you want to do this year?

1 January, 2013